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THE EXCITEMENT OF NEWNESS

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THE EXCITEMENT OF NEWNESS 

Every new thing conjures one’s emotional response. Even a new garment brings the fresh smell of newness. You are eager to wear it. You can’t wait to show the elegance at a party. Sometimes, you want to keep it away from your other clothes. Nothing must stain it. Then one day, you buy another clothe and the previous ones no more play the role that they once played.

When you buy a new car you feel like you have bought the best car in the world. You spend hours touching and testing the knobs and buttons to see how they work. You can’t wait to test it on the road. You want to keep it clean, inside and outside. Nothing must scratch or dent it.

The first shoot of your planted corn brings smiles on your face. You ensure to provide all the right conditions for its successful germination, watering and providing plant feeds and preventing pests. 

When a new person comes into your LIFE it sparks the start of an exciting relationship. You resolve to do everything you can to make it work. Soon, strains start to appear in your relationship, and you are no more fulfilling your resolutions. You resolve to make changes from time to time to bring your relationship to different horizons. You want to keep the flame of love burning as you journey through LIFE.

The birth of a baby brings special excitement. It is a joy to see a new LIFE come into the world after nine months of loneliness in the womb. In your excitement, you resolve to be the best parent in the world, doing everything to give the best to your baby. You look forward to the time when your baby toddles all over the place, gaining memorable milestones as he develops into adulthood.
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Like any new day, the NEW YEAR brings an opportunity for a new beginning. But it is special in many ways. It is the uniqueness of this day that calls for celebration all over the world. It reminds one of the importance of LIFE. It helps us to MEASURE LIFE as it rolls in another year. It is also a time for reflections over not just the previous year, but far beyond the twelve months and, in deed, your whole LIFE. 

As a result of your reflections, you resolve to start a NEW YEAR with plans to make some changes about yourself. You make RESOLUTIONS that you hope to implement over the coming twelve months. But like the car that was exciting when new, you gradually drift away from your resolutions as the months roll on. The year loses its excitement, and at the end of the twelve months, you look forward to the excitement of another NEW YEAR.

Studies have shown that most people fail to achieve their NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS. According to U.S. News & World Report, eighty percent of people fail to achieve their NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS. In fact, most people lose their resolve by mid-February. 

If the statistics is true, it makes one wonder why people should make NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS. However, disappointing as it may be, there is something to say about the New Year’s Resolutions. It is an opportunity for self-appraisal that leads to an attempt to make changes. If you fall to achieve what you have resolved to do, don’t flog yourself. All it shows is that you are human and in the majority. If at the end of the year, you fail to achieve your resolutions, that is just LIFE. Reflect and make your resolutions again in the excitement of another NEW YEAR. So, chill out and have fun.

HAPPY NEW YEAR 

NEVER JUDGE BY THE LOOK

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NEVER JUDGE BY THE LOOK 

have put on so much weight lately, a sign that I am getting old, you may say. One of my strategies to flatten the potbelly is to walk at least two miles daily. It’s no problem doing this on weekends, but it’s often a struggle during the week with my busy life. So, I take every opportunity to do a bit of my two-mile walk whenever I can. 

One such opportunities arose one sunny afternoon. I decided to take a walk to the shopping mall. I had nothing in mind to buy. I only did some window hopping – something I normally undertake on Saturdays. After briefly scanning through the books at bookshop, I stopped over at a music shop and listened to some audio poems. 

I got carried away, listening to audiobooks and had to rush back to work. A gentleman stopped me. He sat down enjoying the summer with a novel, like many other people basking in the summer sunshine. We had spoken briefly when I passed through the square earlier on. He seemed to be interested in Africa. He informed me about the places he had visited and a number of books based on African stories that he had read. 

He closed the book he was reading over his index finger. And beaming with smiles, he shuffled on the long bench and invited me to sit next to him. I was getting late, but I could still spare about ten minutes. I felt it would be a slight to refuse his kind gesture. Besides, I wanted to know more about this middle-aged man who looked like an illiterate, but was an avid reader. I had expected him to ask me the usual question, “Where are you from originally?” that I had got used to. Instead, he asked about what I did and why I was in such a hurry to leave. I told him about my job and that my break was almost over.

“Very good,” he said.

“What about you?” I asked.

“I am not working,” he replied.

That was obvious, I thought. After all, he was only enjoying himself in the sun.

“I mean, what do you do for a living – your job?” I asked him. I had told him my own profession and had expected him to tell me his.

“Oh, I do all sorts,” he smiled.

“And you, what else do you do?” he asked.

“All sorts,” I replied. “And I write, too.”

“Wow!” his eyes lit up.”What do you write about?”

This is near cialis stores http://www.donssite.com/steertech/mack-steering-repair-refurbish-exhaust.htm silent focussing and 1:1magnificant as close as a half hour before. The bean itself cipla cialis canada is white and split urad dal, with the husk removed is an off-white colour. Many medications have viagra low price two names because more than one version of the medicine is available. Ginger buy cialis uk have been used since ages as a herb in preparing food as well as offer incredible help to overcome ED. At that time, I had spent out my break and had got to leave. So, I left him with the link to my books and my Amazon author’s page.

Two weeks later, my secretary informed me that a High Court judge had called. He had asked to speak with me. My heart sank. I didn’t know any judge and I wasn’t expecting a phone call from one. That was the man that I spoke with at the Town Square. He informed me that he had bought all my books and had finished the first one. 

“Fantastic!” he said. “And I look forward to reading the rest of the books. Well done!” he added, before hanging up.

I blinked several times, as I replaced my handset. Just then my secretary entered.

“Is everything alright?” she asked with concern, as she showed her face through the door.

“You won’t believe this,” I said.

“What?” she asked and closed the door behind her.

“Remember I told you about a jobless man I met at the Square the other day?” I reminded her.

She nodded with curiosity.

“That was the man,” I said.”I would never have expected him in a million years to be a High Court Judge the way he looked.”

She nodded again.

“And you know what?” I smiled.

“What?” she wondered.

“He has bought all my books,” I informed her.

“Well, you know what they say,’Never judge by the look,'” she said, and she was right.

WHY I WRITE

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WHY I WRITE

Someone once asked me, “Why do you write?”

“Well, it’s because I enjoy writing,” I replied.

“How do you find the time to write, given that you have a busy job?” she asked.

“I make time for it,” I replied.

That was not the first time that someone has asked me about my writing. So many people have asked me the same question after reading my books. It is all about interest. My passion for writing dated as far back as my secondary school days, when I regularly wrote short stories and poems in the school magazine. As I grew up, I realised that to be a good writer, you should be a good reader. I have read several books of various genres over the years. The more I read, the more I like to write.
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As a child, growing up in Africa was a challenge in many ways. I had the privilege of spending my time both in rural and urban Africa, with opportunity to experience the ethno-cultural as well as religious diversities. Moreover, I grew up in a large family where love blossomed. I emigrated to Europe as an adult. This has brought a new set of challenges and impacted my views about relationships. Day by day, I see the complexity of human character and the strength of human spirit.

Whilst, no doubt, passion is one factor, motivation is equally important. My experiences both in Africa and Europe, provide a rich source of materials for my writing. I am always eager to share these in writing. As a medical doctor, my life is busy. Still, I make time not only to write but also to read and to be with my family and friends.

It’s also about organising your time. Nature endowed everyone of us with only twenty-four hours in a day. You can always set aside a fraction, no matter how small, of these hours for your writing. I do most of my writing in the early hours of the morning. With other members of the family still in bed, I can focus on my writing without any distraction. I also seize every opportunity that becomes available for writing. For example, I edited my latest novel, OKAMBI on the plane en route to a Spanish holiday. Likewise, I wrote most of my novel, DR BRAVER in a hotel. I checked into the hotel that was too noisy for a peaceful sleep. So I took the opportunity to write. DIVINE HOPE and DUTY OF CANDOUR were other novels that I wrote in similar situations.

Modern technology is great for writers. I find my smartphone and tablet particularly useful. I wrote most of my poems on my mobile devices. The idea to write my poetry book, PAGES OF MY HEART occurred to me when I visited Africa. As I walked up and down my birthplace, I remembered how we used to gather under the mango tree. Whilst there, I drafted the poem, UNDER THE MANGO TREE with my Note App and made it one of the poems in PAGES OF MY HEART. My faith inspired me to write ONE FOR THE LORD, another poetry book.

No matter how busy you are, you can always find time do your writing. It’s a matter of passion, combined with dedication and discipline. You can do a self-audit, looking at how you spend your own twenty-four hours. It will amaze you how much of your time goes unaccounted for. This, or part of it, is all you need for your writing.

KEEPING NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS

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KEEPING NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS
The New Year’s day comes with celebrations all across the globe. It is an important landmark in the life of everything in the world, living or nonliving. Not only is it significant as a chronological entity. But it is also a time for self auditing. It provides one an opportunity to reflect on all the events in the previous year. It is a magical time when you want to put all the pains, anger, disappointments, etc behind you. You decide to set goals for yourself. So you draw up your “New Year Resolutions.”

I visited my friend on New Year’s day. Bobo and I have been friends since childhood. As usual, we discussed various issues ranging from politics and religion to football. We both shared stories of all that had happened to us in the past year. Some of the stories made us laugh. Others brought tears to our eyes. But that’s life. Whether we like it or not, good and bad always walk together.

“This year is going to be different,” Bobo said with a tight fist. “I have made my New Year Resolutions. It’s going to be different this year.”

“Really?” I squeezed my eye.

I couldn’t help laughing. Bobo, like most people make New Year Resolutions. So that was nothing new. I recalled that one of my good friend’s resolutions last year was to be more organised. He confidently resolved to keep a tidy library. I sat down on the only seat that had nothing on it in my friend’s study. Heaps of unopened letters and journals with thick layers of dust on them made the room look like the waste recycling centre. My eyes caught one of my books that I gave him as a present last year. I pulled it out of the pile of his “favourite books.” As I dusted the book and many others on that row, I wondered what would happen to his resolutions again this year.

“Trust me, my friend,” he said. “This year will be different.”

I must admit, Bobo is not alone. Like most people, Bobo makes his Resolutions on New Year’s day. But only few people make the changes they pledge to make. In fact, studies have found that “43% of people who made resolutions broke their “promise” within the first few days or weeks, and 66% didn’t make it past February.”

I stopped making New Year Resolutions a few years ago. Of course, I believe in making changes. But I don’t wait till the first day of January to make that decision. You can make changes anytime and don’t need to wait till the New Year’s day. The important thing is the decision to make those resolutions. You can decide on the day you want to start. It can be the beginning of the week, month or year. As for me, my landmark is my birthday. That’s when I make my own resolutions.
Along with these points one has to make sure that he does not stays with the issue and do not face it for their whole life time. cialis buy usa Minimal invasions are now opted for surgeries and the incisions are http://deeprootsmag.org/2014/07/21/jackson-galaxy-feline-miracle-worker/ purchase cheap cialis approached from the under arm, breast or chest are done to avoid the neck area to be exposed. A Psychiatrist will assist in sorting all kinds of mental overnight cialis soft troubles and disorder so that you can do to boost your levels of testosterone are required for keeping men virile, energetic and potent. Such is the mechanism of best price viagra Generic 100mg, which when taken with water 60 minutes before intercourse, increases blood flow to particular areas of the body.Tadalafil is used to treat erectile dysfunction (impotence) and symptoms of benign prostatic hyperplasia. Whatever the time you choose to make your resolutions the most important thing is to keep them. The following tips may help you to achieve them:

Keep them simple and specific: You may have several goals you want to achieve. Perhaps you have the desire to change many things about yourself. Trying to achieve all of them at the same time is likely to cause disappointment. You are more likely to keep your resolutions if you focus on one or two of your most important goals.

Make realistic resolutions: Some goals may be desirable. But are they achievable? You should not aim for goals that are clearly unachievable. Examine your previous experiences and try to figure out what led to failure. In setting your goals, think of factors that may prevent you from achieving them and whether you can deal with those factors.

Write them down: Write your resolutions clearly and boldly and display them where you can always see them. By so doing, you constantly remind yourself of your commitment.
Set Small Goals or Goals in small chunks: Break your goals into clear short-term manageable bites. It is easier to see how well you are doing when you put the road to achieving your goals in phases. Success in those short-term phases will ultimately lead to achieving the main goal.

Power of Repetition: Habit is second nature. It is one of the most difficult things to change. You need to consciously repeat the new habit. If you find yourself drifting back to the old habit, keep on your determination. Don’t flog yourself. Instead, keep reminding yourself that there is no habit that you cannot change. It may help to share your decision with friends and family and let them know how they can help. However, you must put yourself in charge.

Reasons for the change: Constantly remind yourself why you want to make this change. This is especially vital in those moments when the going gets tough and you feel like giving up. You know why you are doing what you are doing. Let that spur you into action. Do whatever it takes to achieve your goal.

Reward yourself: When you achieve each of the chunks of your goals, congratulate yourself. Even if during the process, you have made one or two failures, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that you have done your best. Start on the next phase and keep going. At the end of it all reward yourself with something really good.

Those of you who have made new year resolutions, I hope you will keep them. All the best.

CAN YOU TRUST?

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fullsizeoutput_20a0CAN YOU TRUST?

When you go to a restaurant, you expect to have a meal that has been prepared in a hygienic manner. You don’t ask the pilot to show you his license when you board a plane. You assume that he is certified to fly you safely. You don’t ask for papers to confirm that the plane has had regular services, and it is safe to fly. The taxi driver waits for you holding up a piece of paper with your name written on it. You follow him to the parking lot and expect that he has a valid driving license, and he is an authentic taxi driver.

Imagine attending your doctor’s surgery one day. “What can I do for you today?” the doctor asks. “Oh, before we start, can you show me your certificate?” you reply. Of course, that does not happen under normal circumstances. You don’t ask your doctor or dentist to show you his medical certificate before treating you. It’s all to do with trust.

Your child jumps on you. You hold her up, throw her up several times and even turn her upside down. She smiles with pleasure and urges you, “Again, dad.” Then she sits on your laps as you tell her stories. She doesn’t argue. After all you are her parent. She doesn’t have to read any book about trust. She probably even doesn’t know the true meaning of, and what it takes to trust. But she trusts you anyway. She trusts her parents to take a good care of her, to love and protect her.

Someone whom you believe not to like you invited you to a dinner. Would you accept the invitation or would you find excuses to turn him down? What about when you have just started a job? One of your new colleagues smiled at you when you entered the office. She even made you a cup of tea with biscuits. Within minutes, she told you everything about everybody. The other colleague gave only a brief smile. She talked a little but simply concentrated on what she was doing. Which of these two colleagues would you trust?

Trust is an important attribute in our life as human beings. As a matter of fact, it is fundamental to the human web. It is the strand that knits together the fabric of what we know and recognise as society. Good relationships are based on trust. Trust goes beyond relationships between two persons or among family members. It goes beyond racial, religious or ethnic bounds.

As a growing child, I saw the world as a beautiful place. I was surrounded by families and friends that showed nothing but love and care. Now grown up, I marvel at what people do to their fellow human beings. I could not understand how people who once lived together and did everything together suddenly became enemies, burning neighbours’ houses, slaughtering their children and causing many untold havocs. I see the trust I once had in my fellow human beings eroding on a daily basis. The world no more looks like the one I was born into. It gets worse everyday. Then I ask myself. “Can I really trust anyone? Can I trust people?”

One day, my friend visited me. “Did you know that Tom and Philippa are going through a divorce?” he asked. “Oh!” I replied. “He told me to keep it secret,” he continued, “but I believe that I must tell you since Tom is our friend.” “Oh!” I replied again. It is true that Tom is our mutual friend. As a matter of fact, I knew about Tom and Philippa’s struggle with their marriage. But Tom told me to keep it to myself, just like he told our friend, Franklin. He trusted us with his secret.

What does it really mean to trust? According to the Cambridge Dictionary, this means “to believe that someone is good and honest and will not harm you, or that something is safe and reliable.” The Oxford Dictionary defines it as “to believe in the reliability, truth, or ability of” the person. Merriam-Webster’s Learner’s Dictionary defines trust simply as “belief that someone or something is reliable, good, honest, effective, etc.” Trust thus encompasses an assured reliance on someone including his character, truth, strength and ability to keep one’s secret. It is that duty that is created by trust that a person keeps to be deemed trustworthy.
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Some people trust easily. But for some other people, trust can be an enigma. There are many reasons while people may find it hard to trust or not to trust at all. When you have been hurt or disappointed by people you have once trusted, you don’t want to trust again. This cannot be more true than in relationship situations, business transactions, political leaders, sports teams, etc. If you were a woman who had suffered an abusive relationship you would fear to trust another man with your love. The reality is that, as long as we live, we are going to be in situations when we will have to decide whether to trust or not to trust.

We can make better choices about who and when to trust by trying the following principles:

Give Yourself Time to Think. Avoid making important decisions on impulse. It is always best to step back and give yourself time to consider all the aspects of the decision you are about to make. Think of the benefits but also consider what is at stake. You may need to do your own investigations about the person and seek the opinion of a friend with trusted judgment.

Beware of the Smooth Operators. These are people with sweet tongue. They can talk you into doing anything. They are the typical hard sellers who will want you to trust that you have got a good bargain. They may even make it look like what you are about to buy is scarce, just to lure you. Similarly, someone who wants to form a relationship with you may appear to be the nicest person on earth.

Beware of Fast Movers. If you have just met someone and, straightaway, he wants to be your best friend or lover, you need to be careful. Take your time to know the person well before committing yourself. Better to have a few friends that you can trust than lots of untrustworthy ones.

Probe into the person. What is this person really about? Does he want you for his own selfish benefit? Some people want to form a relationship with you for what they want to gain. They don’t care about what you gain or lose in forming that relationship. They are good at projecting false images of themselves. They may even flatter you to make you feel good. You need to ask yourself, Is this person really what he seems to be? Can we live together? Have we got common values? From talking to him, does he sound like someone who could keep a secret? What is his past like? Is he always criticising people? Is he contemptuous of other people? Has he got close friends or family? Does he like to help people? These are some of the questions that are worth asking yourself to enable you look beyond the superficial appearance of the person and discover his true nature to decide whether you can trust him.

Your Gut Feeling. You may feel an instant connection with somebody. You can’t ignore your emotions. But be cautious. Don’t make that the sole reason for your decision to trust. Your emotion can cloud your judgment. Take other factors into consideration as well.

In the world that we live, there is always going to be people who would hurt us. We can’t but form relationships. We just have to be more careful about who we trust.

WHAT CAN YOU DO WHEN SOMEONE DOES NOT LIKE YOU?

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IMG_0358When you get on the bus or train, or walk into an office, the looks on people’s faces tell, more than words, that they do not like you.It is everywhere: on the road, on the bus, in the supermarket queue, at work, in the hospital, at the children’s playground, at the pub, at the church and even in our own family settings.

People are abound who do not like you. Such people do everything not to like you, even when you do everything you can for a better relationship. They may not like you for reasons of race, beliefs, gender and sexuality or several other reasons. But people can also dislike you for reasons that you cannot understand. Ironically, even if you ask them why they dislike you, they cannot come up with any tangible reason.

Look at the situation with Lucy Davies, for instance. Her boss was after her. There was nothing that Lucy could do right, as far as Sister Simpson was concerned. She followed Lucy everywhere, looking not only over her shoulders but also into her throat. Like Lucy, Dr Chuks suffered in the hands of his boss who saw nothing good about him. Dr Braver did everything to frustrate Dr Chuks despite the fact that he was a fantastic surgeon. Likewise, Sister Barnes was at Nurse Simmonds throat even when she tried to give her patient some hope.

We all encounter people who do not like us in our daily lives. But people do not have to like you. Likewise, you don’t have to like them. Sometimes we are stuck with such people at home and at work, and they challenge our lives. Of course, we feel bad if people do not like us. It is human to feel that way. After all, we human beings are social animals. We feel love and affection. It upsets us when someone shows the opposite. Moreover, we need each other to survive, and so we form friendships as we journey through schooling, childhood and throughout our professional careers.

But what do you do when someone does not like you? In certain situations, whether someone likes you or not doesn’t matter, and you should not let that stress you. This is the case, for instance, when someone gets up from the seat on the bus because you try to sit next to him, or pulls face when you stand next to him on the supermarket queue. Likewise, the guy who pulls his face just because you are different should not bother you. Those people don’t matter and you can choose to ignore them and let them live with the guilt.

What about in those situations when you are “stuck” with someone who does not like you? Such is the situation when you have to live with a difficult or unreasonable boss on whom your future largely depends. It’s easy to let a person with a challenging behaviour ruin your life unless you have effective ways for dealing with him. I have found the following strategies helpful in those difficult situations:

Calm down

The first rule when dealing with a difficult person is to keep your cool. You can deal with most situations if you follow this golden rule. When a person does something bad towards us out of their dislike for us we feel angry or upset. During that charged moment it is pretty easy to overreact. The first rule in the face of an unreasonable person is to maintain your composure. When you feel angry or upset with someone, calm down lest you say or do something you may regret later. The less reactive you are, the more you can engage your faculty to better manage the situation.

Keep your distance

Some situations are not worth the fight. Don’t waste your valuable time tussling with unreasonable people. Unless there is much to lose, don’t try to change or convince such people. Keep your distance when you can, but when you have to interact with them, be diplomatic.

Diligence

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Avoid gossips

It is common in workplace for people to gossip about a difficult boss. Try not to take part in gossips. The same person who tells you something about your is the one who will pass what you have said to him. You will maintain your dignity and self regard by avoiding gossips.

Be proactive rather than reactive

It is very easy to make a wrong judgment about a person just because we believe that he does not to like us. When the person makes an honest criticism, we may see it as part of his dislike even when such criticisms are for our own good. You should view every situation with objectivity, minimise misinterpretation and channel your time and energy towards problem-solving. Avoid direct confrontation.

Try a bit of humour

When used appropriately, humour can be a powerful weapon to disarm a person with difficult or unreasonable behaviour. Dr Chuks, for instance, utilised this tool when he attended Dr Braver’s Christmas party. “What do you give your dogs in Africa?” Dr Braver asked, wanting to ridicule his African colleague as he devoured the pork shin. All the guests turned their attention at the African doctor. But before they could laugh to embarrass him, Dr Chuks replied, smiling, “Oh, we give them chocolate.” All the people burst into laughter. Even Dr Braver could not resist joining in, laughing and clapping.

Stand up to Bullies

As discussed above, you should pick our fights as not all situations are worth the fight. However, you should confront bullies when it is safe to do so. By so doing, you will reduce or eliminate their threatening behaviour, which will ultimately help to increase your confidence and give you peace of mind. Bullies tend to pick on weak ones. It is also to be noted that whilst bullies show an outward aggressiveness they are cowards on the inside. When someone they have perceived to be weak stand up to them they often back down.

Someone is always there

Finally, be encouraged that nothing lasts for ever, even your interaction with someone who does not like you. Sometimes all you have to do is to simply wait and someone else will fight your fight. Dr Chuks, for instance, was lucky to have Dr Saints taking on Dr Braver. Likewise, Samantha Guest had to fulfil her duty of candour to Lucy Davies and Angela Fletcher brought hope to Gail Simmonds.

Mr Sluggard

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imageThe Lazy Man’s Life

The cock crows, announcing the dawn of a new day. Mr Sluggard tucks himself further into his blanket. “It can’t be dawn so soon,” he murmurs. He has been in bed since seven the previous night, yet he wants to sleep for one more hour. Mr Sluggard’s friends knock at his door. “It’s time to go to the farm,” they announce. As the door handle turns, Mr Sluggard turns in his bed and yawns, “Oh, how I wished it could rain so I could sleep more.”

In my place they say, “The lazy man calls for it to rain.” When it rains it really pours. It’s like bullets have hit you, and the footpaths are impassable. So, much as farmers need water for their plants to grow, too much rain is bad for them. One can understand, therefore, how the saying walked into our everyday communication. Mr Sluggard knows this and he prays that it rains heavily.

“We can’t wait any longer,” his friends warn him. “We will leave you if you don’t get up.” He drags himself to the window. He yawns gain, and after scratching his head, turns to his friends. “There was a prowling lion on the road to the farm the other day. It’s a fierce lion. It nearly got me.”

“Ha ha ha,” his friends laugh. Unable to persuade him, Mr Sluggard’s friends leave him to slumber. Now it’s midday. He yawns as he looks through the window. “Why has it not rained?” he asks. Then he hobbles into his kitchen. Nothing to eat. He can’t cook. The sink is full of unwashed utensils. “This will do,” he says to himself, as he takes a bite on the previous day’s left over cocoyam.

Weeks have passed. It is a beautiful day. Mr Sluggard trudges to his farm with a stomach full of cassava. He can’t find the entrance to his farm. Weeds have overtaken the small farm, forcing life out of the crops. “I will need a very sharp cutlass,” he says to himself, as he turns back to return home.
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He stands before the coconut tree and pleads, “Please drop a coconut, for I like the sweat taste of the coconut.” Nothing happens. He hisses and finds a group of people playing Ayo game. He joins them, hoping someone will bring a keg of palmwine. That’s how he spends his day.

Now it’s harvest time. His friends bring home loads of maize, cassava and yams, produce of their hard work. Their barns are full of yams. Mr Sluggard stands outside his friend’s house, his mouth watering, as they pound the yam. He knows exactly when to visit his friend. After clearing his throat, he remarks, “These yams are really matured. I’m sure they will be really tasty.” He knows his friend will always welcome him to dinner. After stuffing himself, and now looking like a python that has swallowed an elephant, he packs all the leftovers so he may have something to eat the following day.

He turns himself into a beggar, living at the mercy of his friends. He becomes the visitor who always turns up at dinner time, and the friend who doesn’t ever have, burrowing money here and there. He watches his children growing up to become servants and his whole family becomes a laughing stock.

That’s the life of a lazy person. The person who is unwilling to work or do something will always find an excuse. The time is never right for the sluggard. But laziness goes farther and more dangerous than the prowling lion. The body is wonderful. It does whatever you want it to do. The less you do, the less you want to do and the more useless you end up.

No one is born with laziness. It’s simply a habit we pick up as we grow up. But it’s a habit that can sometimes be deadlier than a disease. To overcome laziness, you need to make conscious efforts to change your habit. It is not an incurable disease. After all, it’s only a habit. Start by taking small steps towards change. Don’t yield to bodily comfort when you should be up on your feet to face what life throws at you. Don’t be like Mr Sluggard who keeps making excuses that render him useless. If only Mr Sluggard would realise that nothing comes easy. Don’t frighten yourself from the chances of success by imagined difficulties. There’s no excuse for failure. It takes courage and determination to ignore our physical comfort. Sometimes all it takes is just a little push and you are up and going. Try it and you will be a winner.

WATCH YOUR TONGUE

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IMG_1300Watch Your Tongue

I don’t like making or receiving phone calls on public transport. I prefer texting, not so much because of confidentiality, but because sometimes that could be a nuisance to other people. I get irritated when people’s phones ring with some weird ring tones or when the person next to you speaks so loudly that your ear drums are in danger or in a language that you don’t understand. There’s one phone that I cannot ignore. That’s my brother’s. Femi will call you repeatedly until he hears: “Hello!” from the other end.

On this day, I was on the bus home after a busy shift. I heaved a sigh of relief that I found a nice seat where I could just settle quietly and hopefully have a nap. On a good day, it would take an hour to get home. The guy sitting next to me smiled, as I took my seat. He had a gentlemanly look. I smiled back, thinking, Not the type of person who would spend the whole time on the phone! Having made sure that I had set my phone to vibration, I settled down. I was about to dose off when my phone started to vibrate. At first, I ignored it as I always did when on the bus. My eyes blinked several times as the caller’s name appeared: Femi. “Oh no, not now,” I grumbled, as I put the phone back into my pocket. But I knew, of course, that I was joking. Femi would never leave a message on the smartphone. He would try and try until I picked it. So I wasn’t surprised when my phone vibrated again seconds later.

“Hello!” I answered, hoping that the signal would be poor and I could tell him that I would call back when I got home.

“Bawo!” Femi replied, breathing heavily. And that was it. My brother was unstoppable. Thirty years abroad have not robbed him of a good control of the Yoruba language. My sleep disappeared from my eyes as I kept nodding, laughing and replying with encouraging “O ti o!” “Beni!” and “Rara!” I was glad when Femi said, “O dabo,” signalling the end of our dialogue.

Although I did actually enjoy talking to my brother, I felt terrible that I had done something that I really disliked. I turned to the guy sitting next to me, and with guilt conspicuously written on my face, I said, “Sorry about this.”

“Ko si wahala,” he replied with the most amazing smile.
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I nearly collapsed. I had not expected a guy of a different colour to understand my language particularly on a bus in a foreign country. “Oh, my God!” I screamed, ignoring the attention of the other passengers. The guy surely heard and understood everything that I discussed with my brother. Imagine what would have happened if I had said something bad about him or discussed things that were somehow implicating.

“Lola,” I said as I stretched out for a handshake.

“Tom,” he replied, still smiling.

Son of an oil engineer, Tom Solomon grew up in Lagos. Talking to Tom in my native language gave me a feeling that I could not describe. It was like talking to my own brother. We subsequently exchanged our contact details and have since formed a strong friendship.

This reminds me of Dr Chucks’s encounter with Pam Boggy, his medical student under Dr Braver. He had not expected to find a girl who could speak pidgin English thousands of miles away. That moment of discovery sent powerful impulses through both of them and formed a good soil for love to blossom.

Both stories had positive outcomes, one resulting in a lasting friendship, and the other in romance. My encounter with Tom could potentially have resulted in embarrassment had I assumed that the guy sitting next to me had no chance of understanding my language. The power of language must not be underestimated. Next time you sit next to someone who apparently looks different, there’s a chance he/she may understand your language. Watch your tongue.

Can we learn from the eagle and eaglet?

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IMG_1282.PNGCan we learn from the eagle and eaglet?

If you try and you don’t succeed try again, again … and again!

To say that I have seen an eagle is, stating the obvious, especially as I grew up in Africa. Eagles fascinate me in several ways. They have a superb vision with eyes that are designed to see both far and near. This endows them the ability to hunt from a distance, sitting high on top of a tree or hills. They can spot a prey several miles away. To succeed in life you must have a clear vision. Know what you want and go after it. Don’t limit your vision. If you read the biography of many great leaders and successful people, past and present, you will find they all have this characteristic.

Eagles are brave and strong. The eagle does not mind the size of its prey. It will always give a good fight to overpower its prey no matter how strong or big. Successful people are fearless. They stand up to challenges and confront them head on.

There are many cities in India with the real estate sector seem to have come off driving up the valuations. levitra without prescription Continued Instead of worrying about ED, it is better that you go for viagra best buy for sale. Kamagra is just like sildenafil soft any other prescription drug that could be taken by men of all age groups. The main tools that CBT uses are: – teach the cute-n-tiny.com buy cheap viagra victims to recognize and then monitor the symptoms when the attack happens – educate the patients about the treating colorectal cancer. I never knew the eagle was a wise creature until I watched a scene demonstrating the fascinating, yet untold, characteristic of the eagle. An eagle flew pass majestically, seemingly casually. But all the animals and birds got the message. They knew nothing was casual about the mighty eagle. Hence, they flew and raced helter skelter to take shelter. Only the tortoise was left, as it could not race like others. So it reluded into the protection of its shell. As I watched the eagle landing on the tortoise, I said to myself, “You must be joking!” wondering how the bird would crack the tortoise shell. The eagle turned the tortoise over, trying to gain access to the flesh within the hard shell but all its efforts were unsuccessful. What really fascinated me was that it picked this large tortoise between its claws and flew as high as possible and then released the tortoise. As the helpless, presumably dazed or dead tortoise cascaded down, the bird followed it onto a predetermined rock. The tortoise landed heavily shattering its shell. As I watched the bird devouring its prey, I couldn’t help admiring its wisdom. But it also demonstrated another characteristic. Perseverance. Rather than give up, the eagle thought a way out of its difficulty and was able to crack the shell. We can take a simple message from this scene. Crack the shell of your problem so you can see the goodness hidden within the shell. Never give up.

The eagle seizes every opportunity. It is tenacious. Whenever there’s a bush fire eagles fly high above the flames watching animals and birds that are trying to escape from the blaze. These become easy targets as they are desperate and confused, looking to escape from their predicament. Similarly, when storm comes other birds fly away. But the eagle spreads its massive wings, allowing the current to propel it to greater heights. Whenever there’s a problem we should try and get something out of it rather than bury our heads in the sand or grumble. Look at every change as an opportunity to turn it into a gain. You cannot expect to rise to greater heights unless you are prepared to fly above the storm.

Recently, I was lucky to watch the eagle teaching its baby how to fly. Eagles are known for their ability to nurture their young. Mother eagle allowed the eaglet to patch on its back. She flew high and suddenly swooped out from under the eaglet and allowed it to drop. The eaglet struggled but couldn’t fly. Realising that it hadn’t mastered the art of flying, the mother eagle quickly flew under the terrified eaglet and allowed it to rest on her wing as she returned it to the nest. Later, the mother eagle pushed the eaglet out of the nest. Mother eagle must have considered it either to have mastered the skill or expected to be matured enough to fly. She simply watched as the baby continued to drop. Left on its own, the eaglet spread its wings and gallantly made the first flight and that was it. In life, we can’t always succeed the first time. Sometimes we have a mentor. But we can’t depend on people for ever. The eaglet tried several times with the support of its mother. Like the mother eagle, we should empower people under us, teach and show them the right way to do things. Like the eaglet, however, we must know that we too have to play our own part. It was only when the eaglet realised that it needed to learn to fly to survive that it did. So it is with us.
Let’s learn from the eagle and the eaglet. If we try but fail we have to try again and again.

 

World Cup: My Thoughts

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imageWorld Cup: My Thoughts

The World Cup could quite rightly be regarded as the most popular international sporting activity. Unlike previous tournaments, I watched all the matches featured in the 20th World Cup. Like previous matches, people made predictions as to which teams were likely to play the finals, and most importantly, which team would win the coveted cup.

No one would have predicted that Spain, the then cup holder would be knocked out so soon or Italy and France would not qualify in the group stage. It was unthinkable that Brazil, that one would bet on winning the finals, suffered a humiliating 7-1defeat in the hands of Germany.

As I watched the matches, my thoughts were challenged in many ways. I watched as people danced, laughed and threw themselves on the floor when their teams scored. I also watched people crying, as if they were bereaved, when their teams lost. Of course, there had been incidents in previous matches that had caused anger or controversy. I remembered when England lost to Argentina through a goal that was thought to be scored by Diego Maradona’s hand. This was accepted as a genuine goal although many people believed the legend used his hand, dubbed ‘Hand of God‘ to score the goal.

Whilst the unexpected winners and losers might have surprised me, one thing I could not get out of my head was the incident where a player bit another on the shoulder. I cast my mind back decades ago when I was a kid playing on the village Primary School lawn or on the sandy beach. I could not remember a time when a kid bit another kid during matches. And yet a professional millionaire footballer with international fame allegedly did that in the 2014 World Cup.
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I could not help asking myself, “Why is it that human beings have made ‘Winning’ a do or die phenomenon? Is it one of those unwritten natural characteristics of human beings?” I also asked myself, “Why is it that some teams are so good that they always do well and others play so poorly you could bet they would lose?” As I watched the matches, my thoughts took me back through previous tournaments. It was not by political strength, country size, military or economic strength that countries had won. Champions were not made by all these virtues but by the quality of the teams.

Winning is great and, of course, it’s rewarding for the players who have put great efforts into the matches. However, we must not forget that football is a game at the end of the day. What I really mean is that, first and foremost, it is to be enjoyed and there should be no grudge or malicious act. There is nothing wrong with a ‘Win, win’ attitude but winning by any means including malicious attack verbally or physically on fellow players is unprofessional. In my humble opinion, I do not believe that football is worth dying or killing for. Win if you can, but if you lose, at least you have entertained.

Germany and Argentina deservedly played the finals. I enjoyed the match as neither of them was my favourite team which was good as I was able to watch it with an unbiased mind, applauding as appropriate. In truth, either of the teams could have won, but by fate, it was Germany that, in the end, lifted the coveted trophy. Germany was arguably the best team in the tournament and the first European country to win in the American continent.

Winners come, winners go, but human attitude changes little. If there is anything to take home from the World Cup 2014, it will be remembered as one in which the odds were beaten. Brazil suffered a humiliating defeat on its own soil and a player recklessly bit another player. No team has the prerogative of being unbeatable. Who knows? May the next World Cup would be won by an underdog, perhaps one of the African or Asian countries that has never won. We shall see.